Thursday, August 27, 2009

SWEET! Party tonight bitches. It’s Luis’ birthday gig tonight and I haven’t seen the best friend anyone could ask for in months. Luis is the kind of friend that would drag a semi-truck with his teeth to help you out. And when his teeth fall out, he’ll give a short speech about how he’d been wanting to get rid of them anyway and keep pulling. Since the current economy doesn’t permit a sufficient salary for an aspiring writer to pay for his phone bill, I take my usual stroll to the Starbucks at the corner, laptop in hand, to steal some wi-fi and get a hold of someone to make ride arrangements. Hmm. No one’s on. I decide to just finish reading Blue Bloods and work on the some of the programming for the game ‘till someone shows up.

3 hours later

Tartar sauce. I leave a message for Vanessa and decide I need to get to my mom’s regardless. I need to pick up what she owes me from the last job she asked me to do as a favor and the Disney Package I had stored away a while back specifically for Luis and the gang. Most importantly, she can give me a ride. Squinting, but smiling, I look up at the blistering sun causing me to take a second shower in my own sweat as I wait through the three bus trip. Walking up to my mom’s carless driveway I see a pink slip on the door. The electricity had been disconnected. My smile dwindles slightly as I daydream of shooting rockets and shitting oil spills on Diddy Kong Racing. Apparently sitting on the bus was exercise enough to develop a ravenous appetite. I instinctively prowl over to the fridge hoping not everything is spoiled. There’s plenty of food and most of it’s still respectibly cold, but therein lies the problem. Can’t use the oven and can’t use the microwave. My concoction was bred purely of a carnal hunger, but let me tell you, that shit was DELICIOUS. I scooped up the last of the lowfat yogurt into a bowl and puréed a couple eggs in. Milkshakes and yogurt are the best to do this with. The egg’s flavor disappears completely, so it doesn’t taste any different, but you’ve just packed a nice amount of protein in. I proceeded to chop up a left over avacado and banana and threw the slices in. Some natural honey to add a tantalizing and healthy sweetness tops it off after a dash of salt as is mandatory for that amount of sugar. Washing that down with some V8 tomato juice was orgasmic. Easily a 1000 calorie snack that was as good for you as a multi-vitamin of awesomeness.
Revived from my growling stomach, my lethargic feet stumble over to the piano mumbling profanities about FPL. Caught up in the euphoria of my hunger’s satisfaction and my dancing fingers, I realize mom still isn’t home. WTF mate? With no phone or internet to use I march out down the street and around the corner to the pay phone at the gas station.

“Hello?”
“Hey, mom.”
“Oh, hi pipo. Que paso?”
“Where are you?”
“Boca. Why?”
“…..”
“Hello?”
“When are you coming back?”
“Tomorrow.”
“shitfuckasscunt. Oh. Okay. Nevermind.”
*click*

Alright. S’all good. Immediately, I march over to the bus stop on the corner. I’ll just catch the bus to Luis’. I have no idea if he’s there, but even if he’s not I can ask his parents to call him since I don’t know his number. I’m covered.

One hour later.

“The last bus passed already didn’t it?” I say aloud to no one. Taking a deep breath, I relax and think, “Now what?” Everything was way too far to walk to. The busses weren’t running. And I don’t know anyone’s number by memory. That’s where I stopped myself. I DID know someone’s number by memory. Fuck me running. I stepped up to the nearest pay phone and reluctantly put in the two quarters. It swallowed them. I went back to the first pay phone I had used to call my mom and again, reluctantly put the two quarters in. It started to ring then went dead. “Argh?” My scooby doo inner voice thought. I should take it as a sign. I really shouldn’t be calling the ex I haven’t talked to in months to ask for someone elses phone number. Then I remembered the million and one times Luis spot me some cash, never asking for it back, or gave me a ride when I was stranded in B.F.E., or played the responsible one, when even HE was drunk, and took care of all of us. The idea of giving up quickly disappeared. I put yet another two quarters in and called. This time I got through. Long enough to half explain why I was calling before the call cut off. I pumped an exasperrated fist in the air as I walked a couple more blocks down the street to the next pay phone. Five dollars in change later I was out of quarters with a $50 bill the gas station refused to let me change. Feeling a bit defeated I decided to hang around the pay phone for a while longer in hopes that she’d call back.
I’m not sure exactly how much time passed. In fact, I have no idea whatsoever how much time passed. It felt like ages. Like an eternity. Every second, I had to remind myself WHY I was waiting.

*ring*

Effing whoot! I ran up to the phone like a giddy school girl.

“Hello?!
Hello?
HEEELLLLLLOOOOOO?”

Wuuuu-fucking-saaaaa. Without another word I sharply turned and walked back towards the gas station. Calmly and politley I walked up to the first person I saw,

“May I use your phone for just a second, please?”
“Sure.”

Finally, by a miracle of whatever divine entity you believe in, I got through to Jessi and got Vanessa’s number. I kindly thanked the person that lent me their phone and walked up to the next person I saw, repeating the same request.

(groggy voiced) “Hello?”
“Vanessa? Where are you?”
“Home, why?”
“……”
“Hello?”
“Come again?”
“I’m home, what’s going on?”
“What happened to Luis’ telly?”
“Oh, we’re not doing it. We’ll do something Saturday though